Our world expands as we age… from a toddler to an adult, our life transforms itself at every stage, oblivious to our observance, most of the time, but it does change. Our circle inflates from our mother to our immediate family and further to our friends and then a complete set of strangers become our “family”, leaving the real family behind. Subtly, these modifications lead to the deviations in our emotions as well, making the dents irreparable…
Love is our basic nature and so is the sense of belongingness, care is what we do all do and affection is what we all give and receive. But as we age, the capacity to love dies a natural but unnatural death. It seems a logical deduction of the life that we are living based on a series of incidents we experience and hence, looks the most likely outcome. However, it is opposite to our core, our core is to love, love unconditionally, love is not an emotion; it is our being… therefore, it is unnatural not to love and stay away from giving (and receiving!!) your affection to people who come in your life. Unfortunately, experiences lead our lives and the poor soul suffers all along.
As kids, love comes rather naturally to us. We love all around us, see life through rose-coloured glasses and are playful; as we grow, we age chronologically, our hair do turn grey but rarely with wisdom. It is surprising to see the wisdom a child has- he has no apprehensions, no expectations, no conclusions and absolutely no hang-ups in life. He is ignorant of the harsh realities of life which ironically is created by himself in his later years… and he just dances to the music of life, and flows in the direction of the waves effortlessly, yet so gracefully.
The first experience outside our cocoon really happens as we start schooling, that first fight we have with our newly-made friend, the first scolding we get from our teacher, the mockery we face when we have our first fall in public, and this triggers a journey in the “reverse gear”. By the time we complete our schooling, fights with folks are frequent, crushes crush you to a great extent, teachers expect the hell out of you and your affairs leave you half-finished; leaving no space for the real development of you, leading us away, far away from the real purpose of our life. Somewhere down the lane, love has been replaced by this tag of being “cool” and “chilled out” at everything coming your way, nothing bothers you or as a matter of fact, nothing “moves” you. The previous generation has reached this stage near to their retirement age and the generation previous to the previous, did not reach in their lifetime, it is sad to be a part of the current Gen-Y experiencing such turmoil so early in life!!!
Then we somehow gather the courage, once again, this time effort being almost half, when we enter college and then experience the corporate or the household life. Our reactions to people have changed and our emotions have taken a back seat. Logic drives us and ego feeds us constantly, not letting life takes its’ expected course. Our core is covered by layers and layers of hard-unbreakable, sound-proof wall of indifference.
Life goes on but we remain moribund, inert in our approach to “approach” people, the fear of the past experiences haunts us so badly that we fear ourselves and dread our emotions. We might “fall” in love again and “falter “again, therefore, the safest is not to know your emotions yourself. But had “being safe” our centre, the human race would not have progressed so far scientifically and technologically; above all Adam would not have even thought of eating the forbidden fruit…. So when we have either followed our instincts or followed our logic so well and hard, why is it so difficult to follow our heart? Why have we “enveloped” ourselves and are not willing to dive in…. What stops us?
The apprehension will remain until we step up and feel the air around; its’ time to move out of vacuum and feel our emotions completely, for life is a blessed gift, which can be nurtured only by: “loving as we have never been hurt” :-)
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