Friday, April 24, 2015

Yin or/and Yang


For me, it has never been a fight for gender equality. It have been intrigued and frustrated by the difference created, sustained and preserved, un-pronounced, in the society generations after generations. I say it aloud, I am not a feminist and it is not about creating “rules” that promote both genders equally and give them enough opportunities.

Then what is it about?
                                             
Hmmm… I feel (strangely!) that I belong to an era (or planet!) where the basic existence is beyond genders. There is no female and male energy. It is all a play of yin and yang there.

In a lot of religious places, I see men and women sitting in separate sections and at a majority of celebratory functions as well. There seem a few places where the two genders mingle socially for a good time. Perhaps in school/ college days or at the max, early days of a first job. My vision may be constricted here, I admit. I have been party to Indian systems all my life, so far and being brought up in a metro of a “fairly” liberal family. I have always wondered, why don’t the sexes mix up and remain as a group; instead they divide like a Y the moment they enter a social gathering! Doesn’t this sound strange!? It does, to me. Are they only meant to be together under their one roof and that too, with one partner… shhh!!! Am I propagating polygamy here… No! No! No!

Why has gender become an integral part of our identity? Why are we classified as men and women? Why do we still hear, men are not supposed to da da da… and women are meant to ta ta ta…

 In the words of Rumi, “Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there.” I think that he meant a paradise that perhaps we have all experienced at one point or the other, where there is no identity, it’s only I and that equals We. A place where genders and relations of role- play never existed. The existence their is that of unconditionally… Unconditional love, being and just beings of love…

“Out beyond our ideas of ourselves and the world there is a field, I will meet you there…” 

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

A Journey- from Innocence to Survival

It was an unusual day. Our times, on the verge of the millennium, it was not a way of life to go out with friends independently. One of the first few times was a movie outing with a close friend. Enjoying the thrills of Titanic, the day turned out pretty eventful.

When I spotted him, I know he was a 'nice guy'. A smart fellow, decently dressed, emanating respect and courtesy, naturally thoughtful, he approached the two of us. And as I look back, it was destined for us to meet and yet be apart.

All along, he has always been there for me- just a call away! Ready to guide, to share, to be a mentor... All that a growing teenager would want, he provided and that too, in a very safe space. Unable to distinguish categories at that age, he is a friend and more than that, he is a man I respect a lot. A few men have the demeanour of being looked upto in my life and I am proud to say that he is one of them. I have seen him as someone who is a special part of my life, sharing a bond that is unique in ways more than one.

As life progressed and "settling" myself took priority, I called him rarely. He has always been fine with anything- from calling him everyday to just one call each year on his birthday. Never did I hear a tone of complaint in his voice. At times, we are unconscious with our behaviour and have no idea of what we are doing. 

We meet often now (often- once in few months!). I have seen him digress from what the real him is. I wish I could tell him, "I would love to have that guy back who I met 14 years ago." He seems far away from who he is. There seems to be layers that he allowed to be covered with all these years. Time, metro life, experiences and women have turned him into a reckless person, someone whose existence is mainly for survival. From being a man of extraordinary sensitivity and thoughtfulness it feels that he has left his being far behind. 

One day, he will be back and I hope that day comes sooner, rather than later. Love has the highest frequency and each event in life makes us closer to loving more and not the other way around.

Your people want to tell you something... Dear Sun, don't drift away. It is time for you to "return home" and radiate your light...